Oh boy, do I have a treat for you, reader.
Today, I will introduce to you my other humorous half. The love of my life, the apple of my eye, he completes me and all that mushy nonsense.
Now, 40+ years of age have allowed him to mold and firm certain opinions about things. He gets heavily involved in explaining verbally why he feels the way he does and what he is frustrated about. Often there are hand motions. When he REALLY gets going, I start singing the old batman tune and announce his arrival. Without further ado, I present to you:
NANA NANA NANA NANA NANA NANA NANA NANA
RANT MAN!!!
Rant-man likes things to meet within his specific parameters of logic and common sense. He is not a fan of grocery shopping at Fred Meyer’s due to the way it is laid out. I followed him around the store one morning and took notes of some of the gems we “discussed” (he ranted at me).
And Mr. Meyer’s, if you’re reading, no offense intended. It is an interesting experience seeing how you organize stuff…..but you have lots of healthy and convenient options, and my husband is hilarious, so patrons we shall remain!
Here we go…
*What’s on my list today? A less confusing store, that’s what.
*I even asked a lady once that worked there; I said, “this store is laid out really confusing,” and she said, “I KNOW.”
*You’ll find it at WALMART
*While we’re here in the seafood and meat section, do you need any legos? Because They’re right there.
*Well, you know, sometimes there ARE bad ideas
*Cones and toppings in the spices section. Why not?
*I mean if I were oven cleaner, I would be in the cleaner section……..but not here, oh noooo
*I’m surprised they don’t put the parking lot in the back of the building just to go with the theme.
(Me) What theme is that?
The theme of putting things where they don’t belong!
Rant-Man does not limit his beliefs to a mere grocery store blueprint. Here are some other treasures from the perspective of my persnickety partner:
*Let’s go use that STUPID carpool off-ramp they spent millions and millions of dollars on. It’s still a cluster.
*Carpool lanes are freakin ridiculous.
*Stupidity and lack of logic just grinds my gears, wife!
Rant-Man: you are my soulmate, and I love you.
***********************************************
P.S. (Rant-Man tells me this stands for “Post-Script”)
Unrequested and unnecessary review of the Netflix series “Disjointed.”
How did I not hear about or view this series before? I watched four episodes in one day and am a wee bit hooked. It’s got a somewhat annoying sitcom soundtrack, but that’s the only “con” I can think of. It’s starring Kathy Bates (who obviously found her calling going from misery to marijuana)*** and she is perfect for the role.
There are a handful of other recognizable faces from other funny shows and movies, which add to the charm. Most importantly, though, it’s hilarious and touches on many parts of the Mary Jane lifestyle-including the many benefits AND realistically addressing drawbacks- supplemented with hilarity and random sketches representing the inner workings of a character’s mind. I’ve never seen a comedy show like this one before. It’s unique, funny, lighthearted, and D.A.R.E. I say……educational. You’re welcome for the research, reader.
P.P.S. Dudes and dudettes………..I got a logo. Check it out!
Zdravo!
